The title to this post is also the title of a Garth Brooks song. While I am not a huge fan of country music as a whole I do like a few of Garth’s songs. This one included. Since we took up the name “The Wildcardz”, three years ago, the song has stirred visions of Mrs. Cardz and I as parents. And if you’ve read my previous posts, you know whatever joy I felt towards that mental image was quickly replaced with fear and anxiety.
So imagine my surprise, last week, when that little piece of foreseeing plastic broadcasted our fate and I had feelings of joy and relief. I am to be a father. Even now the words seem almost foreign but conjure emotions of hope and happiness. I have always been a cautious person. Preparing for the worst yet hoping for the best. But now that my fate is all but sealed I have found myself reacting not I as I had expected.
We spent most of last weekend hanging out with the Quakers (FYI Mr. Quaker has sarcastically been saying that he is legally changing his name to this pseudonym) and other lifestyle friends. Mrs. Cardz had been abstaining from drinking alcohol because she “wasn’t feeling right”. By Sunday the four of us had come to the conclusion that my wife was indeed pregnant. So much so that, we spent hours at the bar discussing baby-like topics. Mrs. Cardz and I, slightly overeager to confirm our suspicions, called it an early night and raced home so she could pee on a Nostradamus inspired stick and as stated before it was positive.
A few blood tests last week and a few more this week and the early signs say Mrs. Cardz has been pregnant about a month now, with the baby due in early December.
Now we have chosen to keep this all a secret to our families for the next two months. My family is currently plagued with a black cloud of infertility and we don’t think our news would be received with the proper amount of excitement. And since we are waiting to tell my family we have decided to keep it from hers as well. We also want to make sure the pregnancy is on track and beyond the usually turbulent first trimester. Because most of our muggle friends are deeply intertwined within my family we must keep the news from them as well.
To quench our desire to scream this news from the highest rooftop we can find we decided to tell some of our swinger friends this past weekend. Since this pregnancy will no doubt effect our play habits and obviously will keep Mrs. Cardz from partaking of the normal toasts and shots. At times I laughed to myself about how it is we are so comfortable with these people that we have only know a year or so that we rush to tell them the news before we even inform our own families. The bonds we have made in the lifestyle are just like that I guess.
Anyway, our crazy weekends filled with debauchery are sure to slow down as we prepare for this new arrival. I will probably also have less time to work on this blog. But we’ll have to wait and see. If my posts are something you have been enjoying I recommend you add this page to your RSS reader or become a follower. That way when I do find time to post you’ll be the first to know about it.
Also, although I am not a religious person, if you are I recommend you pray to your respective deity. Cause any spawn of the Wildcardz is bound to have an extraordinary impact of the world as we know it.
One Potentially Proud Poppa,
~Jack
Monday, April 19, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
A Follow-Up Conundrum
Well this week although physically exhausting has caused more mental gymnastics then I ever thought possible. A harmless muggle BBQ turned into a flurry of questions and stories…I’m getting ahead of myself.
This past Saturday we decided to throw a party to celebrate the warm weather and our favorite professional sports team. The event was intended to be mostly muggles besides Mrs Cardz and I and the Quakers. Oh and another couple who although they called us out a few years back are not technically lifestylers. Also in attendance was the better share of my family.
All was going well for quite a few hours. The weather was great, the music was loud and we were laughing, drinking and eating to our hearts content. Another couple, friends of the Quakers showed up. Now we had never met this couple before but had heard about them. As Mr. Quaker was doing introductions he made it a point to introduce Mrs. Cardz and I as “friends”. The new couple easily picked up on the distinction however may have thought more people were included in that “friends” label besides just us. Perhaps assuming that my sister and her husband were swingers as well.
As the night drew on most people retreated inside to watch the game however the new couple, Mr. Quaker, and my brother in law stayed outside. I found out a few days later that some comments were made that may have given our secret away. Remember the other couple may have thought my brother in law was one of us. Mr. Quaker told me that my brother in law had remarked about trying to set my sister up with another woman.
Even more intriguing is the fact that my brother told me that my brother in law had told him (yeah I know rumor mill) that he and my sister had gone to a swingers party on Monday night! My first question was “Who the Hell throws a swinger party on Monday night?” followed closely by “And why weren’t we invited?”
Now all of this may be speculation but it raises a few questions. Now my Brother in Law is not the brightest light bulb in the box. He loves my sister and in the end that’s all that matters however I wouldn’t put it past him to try and coerce her into the lifestyle. Which may damage their relationship.
Whether my sister and her husband know our secret I can not say for sure but I almost want to out ourselves to them and give them advice on how to get into the lifestyle should they both wish to do so. It’s a strange situation that Mrs. Cardz and I find ourselves in. I’m almost positive that my sister and her husband would not be surprised if we told them but if all of the stories I’ve heard this week are true, is it the best course of action? We have been in the lifestyle for 3 years now and we have learned A LOT over that time. If they want to join the lifestyle that is their decision and I hope they would accept a bit of wisdom from us. On the same note though I don’t want them coming to any of the clubs or parties we go to. May be a bit strange to be playing with a couple, look over and see my sister, naked, in the distance. I’m Just Sayin!
~Jack
(As I was writing this my RSS Reader showed a post from Deviant and BB. Go check out their blog and see how another couple is handling a similar situation. Thanks for the plug guys. Stay Sexy!)
This past Saturday we decided to throw a party to celebrate the warm weather and our favorite professional sports team. The event was intended to be mostly muggles besides Mrs Cardz and I and the Quakers. Oh and another couple who although they called us out a few years back are not technically lifestylers. Also in attendance was the better share of my family.
All was going well for quite a few hours. The weather was great, the music was loud and we were laughing, drinking and eating to our hearts content. Another couple, friends of the Quakers showed up. Now we had never met this couple before but had heard about them. As Mr. Quaker was doing introductions he made it a point to introduce Mrs. Cardz and I as “friends”. The new couple easily picked up on the distinction however may have thought more people were included in that “friends” label besides just us. Perhaps assuming that my sister and her husband were swingers as well.
As the night drew on most people retreated inside to watch the game however the new couple, Mr. Quaker, and my brother in law stayed outside. I found out a few days later that some comments were made that may have given our secret away. Remember the other couple may have thought my brother in law was one of us. Mr. Quaker told me that my brother in law had remarked about trying to set my sister up with another woman.
Even more intriguing is the fact that my brother told me that my brother in law had told him (yeah I know rumor mill) that he and my sister had gone to a swingers party on Monday night! My first question was “Who the Hell throws a swinger party on Monday night?” followed closely by “And why weren’t we invited?”
Now all of this may be speculation but it raises a few questions. Now my Brother in Law is not the brightest light bulb in the box. He loves my sister and in the end that’s all that matters however I wouldn’t put it past him to try and coerce her into the lifestyle. Which may damage their relationship.
Whether my sister and her husband know our secret I can not say for sure but I almost want to out ourselves to them and give them advice on how to get into the lifestyle should they both wish to do so. It’s a strange situation that Mrs. Cardz and I find ourselves in. I’m almost positive that my sister and her husband would not be surprised if we told them but if all of the stories I’ve heard this week are true, is it the best course of action? We have been in the lifestyle for 3 years now and we have learned A LOT over that time. If they want to join the lifestyle that is their decision and I hope they would accept a bit of wisdom from us. On the same note though I don’t want them coming to any of the clubs or parties we go to. May be a bit strange to be playing with a couple, look over and see my sister, naked, in the distance. I’m Just Sayin!
~Jack
(As I was writing this my RSS Reader showed a post from Deviant and BB. Go check out their blog and see how another couple is handling a similar situation. Thanks for the plug guys. Stay Sexy!)
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Strangely Anti-Climactic
Well last week my brother moved in with Mrs Cardz and I. His relationship with his wife has been on the rocks for a while and they recently decided to take a break for a bit. This saddens me greatly. I never really thought the two of them were perfect for each other however they do have children. I will NEVER tell a couple to stay together for the sake of their kids but I do feel bad because I know that if they do seek divorce it will be a brutal battle.
Anyway I digress. My brothers kids are staying with us a few nights a week and I have to admit the glimpse into fatherhood is still kind of scary. Where as I have fun playing with the little rugrats, they just have WAY TOO MUCH energy. I can spend a week in Cancun getting 3 hours sleep each night (sometimes less) and still be the life of the party but these kids drain my power in 1 maybe 2 days tops.
It is because of this that we decided to go out to a bar on Friday night. Even invited my brother along to celebrate his new found (albeit temporary) freedom. Word spread quickly of our plans and soon there was a small army of us going out including the Quakers. The issue here is everyone that went whether muggle or swinger knew about our lifestyle EXCEPT my brother. Now when the idea of my brother moving in with us was initially proposed a few weeks back Mrs. Cardz stated that we may have to tell him about out lifestyle. Figuring we have a few events coming and not being able to invite him or tell him about it he may think something is up.
Anyway back to Friday, we hadn’t even gotten to the bar yet and Mr. Quaker started with his comments. Now my brother has met Mr. Quaker before and writes off most of his comments as joking and flirty. But some of what Mr. Quaker was saying was down right obvious. A few times he caught himself but others…not so much.
So the drinks were flowing, the music was pumping, and we’re all having a good time. Everyone is becoming more brazen with their jokes and comments. Finally I decide it’s better to be active then passive so I pull my brother aside. Mr. Quaker and V, our once unicorn, follow in tow. (The opposite of my intentions).. With my ever-present flair for the dramatic I inform him that “we’re swingers”. To which he responds “Yeah, so?”
WTF?! We put so much stake in this great secret of ours that we hide it from everyone in fear of them ostracizing us if they find out and when I make the “great reveal” to a man who’s known me almost my entire life the response I get is “Yeah. So?”. This marks the 2nd time that I have gotten a half-hearted response when laying our Cardz on the table. (All puns intended) and honestly I’m mildly disappointed.
A debate quickly arose which was more shocking then my brother’s unenthusiastic response. My brother, Mr. Quaker, and V began to discus which members of my family, they believe, already know about us and which would have the same response little bro did. Apparently almost all of my siblings know and most people believe my parents (who Mr. Quaker swears are the King and Queen of swinging) know as well.
At this point and time I’m about ready to throw caution to the wind and just come out to my family. That way it’s all out in the open and there is no more need for secrets or headaches. Mrs. Cardz and I are both in agreement, though, that her family would not be able to handle such a revelation. They are way too uptight and not nearly as easy-going as my family who apparently already know!
I have no interest in causing drama but I think we spend SO MUCH time and headache trying to keep secrets and hide what we do that it may just be easier to tell them and get it over with.
~Jack
Anyway I digress. My brothers kids are staying with us a few nights a week and I have to admit the glimpse into fatherhood is still kind of scary. Where as I have fun playing with the little rugrats, they just have WAY TOO MUCH energy. I can spend a week in Cancun getting 3 hours sleep each night (sometimes less) and still be the life of the party but these kids drain my power in 1 maybe 2 days tops.
It is because of this that we decided to go out to a bar on Friday night. Even invited my brother along to celebrate his new found (albeit temporary) freedom. Word spread quickly of our plans and soon there was a small army of us going out including the Quakers. The issue here is everyone that went whether muggle or swinger knew about our lifestyle EXCEPT my brother. Now when the idea of my brother moving in with us was initially proposed a few weeks back Mrs. Cardz stated that we may have to tell him about out lifestyle. Figuring we have a few events coming and not being able to invite him or tell him about it he may think something is up.
Anyway back to Friday, we hadn’t even gotten to the bar yet and Mr. Quaker started with his comments. Now my brother has met Mr. Quaker before and writes off most of his comments as joking and flirty. But some of what Mr. Quaker was saying was down right obvious. A few times he caught himself but others…not so much.
So the drinks were flowing, the music was pumping, and we’re all having a good time. Everyone is becoming more brazen with their jokes and comments. Finally I decide it’s better to be active then passive so I pull my brother aside. Mr. Quaker and V, our once unicorn, follow in tow. (The opposite of my intentions).. With my ever-present flair for the dramatic I inform him that “we’re swingers”. To which he responds “Yeah, so?”
WTF?! We put so much stake in this great secret of ours that we hide it from everyone in fear of them ostracizing us if they find out and when I make the “great reveal” to a man who’s known me almost my entire life the response I get is “Yeah. So?”. This marks the 2nd time that I have gotten a half-hearted response when laying our Cardz on the table. (All puns intended) and honestly I’m mildly disappointed.
A debate quickly arose which was more shocking then my brother’s unenthusiastic response. My brother, Mr. Quaker, and V began to discus which members of my family, they believe, already know about us and which would have the same response little bro did. Apparently almost all of my siblings know and most people believe my parents (who Mr. Quaker swears are the King and Queen of swinging) know as well.
At this point and time I’m about ready to throw caution to the wind and just come out to my family. That way it’s all out in the open and there is no more need for secrets or headaches. Mrs. Cardz and I are both in agreement, though, that her family would not be able to handle such a revelation. They are way too uptight and not nearly as easy-going as my family who apparently already know!
I have no interest in causing drama but I think we spend SO MUCH time and headache trying to keep secrets and hide what we do that it may just be easier to tell them and get it over with.
~Jack
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